Not a worder, but if was this is where I'd put things that I'd worded.
Drinks with all the right crucifixins' for you and your hedonist friends
Of which some (or all) might be fake
Alternatively: both
For when you're in need of an occassion to drink your magnum of 1945 Chateau Petrus
A non-exhaustive list
If I were clever then this description would be a haiku as well